I hate myself and what I feel
And with the ways I try to deal,
like letting the scissors feast on my arms,
leaving behind these gruesome scars.
I hate the way I cry at night
and hold my body really tight
so no one hears my stifled sobs,
to ensure no one knows whats going on.
I hate the way I feel so fake
when I wear a smile across my face.
And how my laughs never sound quite right
cause I dont know what a real one feels like.
But most of all, what I hate the most
is how I let myself get so close
to a man whom I thought was my whole world,
but who closed his eyes to the part of me that hurt.

(my whole being)